Felice Facile

Discovering an easy way

“We both can win if it is me who gets to choose,”

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IMG_0814…my 6-year-old son said to me when we started playing a card game yesterday.

“But it’s not really fair,” I resisted.

It was indeed very confusing to play this game because he changed rules all the time and it was difficult to follow and to focus. Then, he wanted me to always go first so he could decide which card he wanted to respond with – and to win. And on top of everything, he got to have a magic glittery card that allowed him to change any card any time.

At some point I realized that I was not having any fun at all. I like playing by the rules! I wanted to have the rules! I was always so good at playing by the rules! And I remember very well that most of my disappointments in life came when others were doing something else instead of playing by the rules.

My son is a tough guy, though. An adorably tough guy. He never really accepts my reasoning that games are supposed to be played by the rules.

Finally, I gave up and let him play, as he wanted. And he was really enjoying choosing cards for both of us and deciding what card beats what card, what colors play each round and whether it is a time for the magic card. He made sure, though, that we both would win – to keep the game going.

I relaxed.

This idea of playing without any rules for the sake of playing, totally letting the other to invent and not knowing what comes next is very new for me. Isn’t it how life unfolds at times, without obvious logical rules but someone indeed makes sure that everyone wins and the game goes on?


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